Are thank you notes a thing of the past?


Over the years, I have changed from buying Christmas gifts to making them, and that means hours of baking. Last year I sent about 12 relatives and friends an original recipe of mine - a zuchhini bread. I only heard from about half of them that they actually got it, liked it and thank you! I like to bake and give the loaves, but I really don't want to keep sending them without at least an acknowledment. Maybe they don't like it. Maybe I am wasting time on something they would rather not get.

How do I gracefully ask - hey, did you get the bread? DO you even like it?

Someone told me of a cute note her grandmother would send with the CHristmas cookies she would bake and give, saying something like I hope you like the cookies as much as I had fun making them, and if you want to stay or be a member of my cookie club please reply back to me that you received these, and if you want to get more next year. How can I tactfully say that? Any ideas?

thank you!
Mary the Baker

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Not a unique issue ...
by: Miss P Etiquette

Hello Mary~

Your situation, unfortunately, is not unique. There was a time when children were told to sit down and write their thank you notes. In my home we were not allowed to play with a gift before writing our notes. It was considered terribly rude to take more than 1 week to acknowledge a gift or kindness.

Sadly, those days seem to have evaporated into thin air. So here is my suggestion. Call the people to whom you sent your homemade, unacknowledged gifts about two weeks after sending them. A simple hello; followed by "just wanted to make certain you received my homemade bread. And since it is a new original recipe of mine, it would be helpful to know what you thought of it. I sure don't want to keep making and sending this gift if it doesn't measure up!" Or any variation of this. The point is to keep it light, solicit the recipient's opinion and move on.

While this may not be a perfect solution, it will hit a nerve with some. You have a right to ask if the gift was received when there is no indication it reached them in a timely manner. Who knows, you may remind some that their manners are not showing.


Good luck,

Miss Practical Etiquette


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