giving to co-worker

by were do you stop
(Upper Michigan)

When a co-workers family member dies is it proper to collect money and if so where do you draw the line. Step-Parents, Brothers, Sisters, Aunts, Uncles ? Thanks

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Considerations ...
by: Ms P Etiquette

This is an interesting question! I've given it much thought. As a result, I wish to break this down into sections so we can deal with it property.

1. Why is there a need for money? Is your co-worker asking for help with the funeral? Are there orphans involved? What is the emergency?

2. Have public and family funds been resourced by the family before going to this drastic step?

2. How well do you know the person doing the soliciting? How well do you understand the situation.

3. What does your intuition tell you when you don't over think the issue?

Answering these questions should help you be more informed before deciding what you wish to do.

It is not proper manners to ask for money whether it is for a bride and groom or a deceased relative. If there is acute family need as a result of this death, it should be explained in detail, including where the money is being deposited and in whose account. This is essential information that should be in writing. Finally, would you be donating funds to this co-worker on your own if you had been asked?

Simply put, is is poor manners to solicit funds for private or personal use, especially from co-workers who will feel obligated or embarrassed if they do not comply. Making anyone uncomfortable is never good manners.

You need to decide for yourself, however, etiquette is certainly on the side of refusal.


Good luck.
Ms. Practical Etiquette

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