requesting money "in lieu of flowers"

by Diana
(Bakersfield)

Is it proper to request money for the family "in lieu of flowers" in an obituary?

It seems tacky to me, but rules may have changed.

Comments for requesting money "in lieu of flowers"

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Obituary
by: Ms P Etiquette

Diana~

Usually It is not acceptable to directly request money for the family of the deceased. What is correct is saying in lieu of flowers please send a donation to whatever fund has been formally set up to collect and disburse the money, such as the "Smith Family Fund" at their church or a local charity. Without a system for collection and disbursement, what happens to the funds is questionable, which is not proper.


Thank you for your interesting question.

Ms Practical Etiquette

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