As grandparents, should we accept graduation invitation from our son's exwife for their daughter?

by Toni
(Chicago)

As grandparents, should we accept a graduation invitation from our son's ex-wife for their daughter's party? Our son, who initiated the divorce after 23 yrs of marriage, has asked us not to see his ex or visit her at her house, or anywhere for that matter. His inlaws did or seemed to spread some rumors about him to his friends, and a girlfriend he met about a couple of months after the start of the proceedings, even getting in touch with the woman's clients. Therefore, he felt some nasty things have been done by his ex-inlaws, and would prefer that we stop any communications with them. However, they have never done anything wrong to us in all those years, and we still want to be able to visit them, along with our 18 and 20 year old grandchildren.


What can we say to our son to let him see that we still support him, but need to accommodate our ex-inlaws and Grandchildren?

Comments for As grandparents, should we accept graduation invitation from our son's exwife for their daughter?

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Graduation Party Attendance
by: Ms P Etiquette

Toni,

The question comes down to what do you wish to do? It seems, by your description, that you still want to maintain a relationship with your grandchildren. If that is the case, then you should attend. You will need to counter-balance that with your son's wishes (and concerns). Clearly, if you attend, you will need to have a conversation with your son prior to the graduation. Being put in the middle by both parties is not far to you, so, ultimately, it will come down to what you wish to do.

Best of luck,

Ms. Practical Etiquette

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