Birthday celebration - Jewish HOliday

by suzy Perlmutter
(Los Angeles , CA 91364)

I have a girlfriend who is having a Jewish dinner at her house on Wednesday night. Apparently, the mother, father and sister and the sister kids are coming. The Sister called the other Sister who is making the dinner and said that she was bringing a birthday cake for her daughter who will be turning 12 years old for Wed night dinner. However, she was also was informed that there was another birthday celebration which was happens to be her sisters girlfriend who is celebrating her 55 years of age on Friday, only two days apart. The sister wishes to only celebrate the daughters birthday during the dinner on Wednesday and hopes that the 55 year old would celebrate on Friday. The 55 year old was supposed to be at the dinner as well. My question is regarding etiquette, do you celebrate both birthdays together or do you let the 12 y ear old have the birthday celebration on Wednesday during the dinner and then the 55 year old who is attending the dinner as well to celebrate separately. Since it is a Jewish holiday and not a birthday party, I am assuming a celebration during the dinner is a cake and maybe people singing Happy Birthday.

By the way, the sister fought to have her girlfriend's birthday celebrated as well, however the other sister dictated the command. Now the sister's Mom is getting involved and she believes there should be one (1) celebration during the dinner. The sisters husband who has the girlfriend feels that the 12 year old should celebrate that evening even if the 55 year old is in the same room and her birthday is only two (2) days later.

Please help me as I am tearing my hair out on this one!

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by: Ms P Etiquette


Wow! Someone in this family has too much time on their hands! This is not a question of proper etiquette, it is a family disagreement. I wish you good luck resolving this one! But, what is family without some discord? I hope everyone gets to celebrate.

Ms. Practical Etiquette

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