Mother-in-law sends first birthday card/gift in 20 years
(Northampton, MA, USA )
Hi. My wife and I have been together for 20 years, married for 3 (when the laws changed). I am not close with my mother-in-law. Not that we dislike each other, we get along good enough, but I don't like to talk on the phone after 17 years of working on the Mental Health field. In the beginning, she was stand offish because of the whole lesbian thing, but that didn't last long. We get along in person. She does have a terrible habit of being nice to your face and then saying bad things behind your back. When my wife and I had our child 17 years ago, it took her several years to say she had 5 grandchildren instead of 4. I carried the baby. Fast forward 20 years and I get my very first birthday card with a $25 check in it from her. I wanted to send a thank you card, but my wife is freaking out because I won't call her on the phone. I would like to know what's socially appropriate as well as what your opinion is on if I should have to call her. I "spent" the $25 towards having flowers sent to the MIL as a thank you, but that's the most I have to offer. Now my wife is saying I don't even need to go to her funeral. How am I the bad person when it took her 20 years to acknowledge my birthday? Help...