Accepting money

A close family friend is super generous, and anytime we are together, she insists upon paying for the meal, activity, transportation, etc. Growing up, she was like a second mother to me, and she truly is one of the most genuine and loving people I know. However, I am now in my mid thirties, married with a child, and I feel uncomfortable accepting her monetary gifts. She mailed me a large amount of money saying that she wanted to cover my dress expense for her daughters wedding in which I am reading a chosen passage. She also cited my daughter's first birthday next month as a reason for the gift of "mad money." I'm not sure which is more offensive, to accept the money as a grown woman or to return it. I certainly appreciate her kindness and don't want to hurt her feelings.

Thank you for any help!

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Money Gifts
by: Ms P Etiquette

Hello Perplexed Money Recipient~

Your close family friend seems to really enjoy giving generously to those she loves. I do not think your age has anything to do with her desire to shower you with things.

I doubt you can ask her to stop doing what makes her happy without hurting her feelings and making her feel wrong. Perhaps you plan a dinner out where you arrange ahead of time to pay the bill. Leave your credit card with the server so the bill never goes on the table. It would be a nice surprise for her and a step toward changing the dynamic a little at a time without upsetting this person who has always had your best interest in her heart. Everyone expresses love differently. It does not mean she thinks you cannot afford to take care of yourself.

Ms Practical Etiquette

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