Must we invite a friend's new girlfriend to our wedding?

We are getting married in six weeks. A couple we have known for several years recently went through a divorce and though things were amicable, he wanted the divorce while she did not. He has been dating a new woman, whom we have met twice at different social events but do not really know.

Are we required to invite the new girlfriend to come as our friend's date? The ex-wife is our predominant friend and as much as she puts on a brave face, I know it is very painful for her to watch her ex making out with another woman. (He really is inappropriate at times.) Is it required to allow any single adult guest to bring a date?


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Tough Situation ...
by: Miss P Etiquette

Dear Linda

If your invitation to the ex-husband is addressed to him and "quest", then you cannot dictate whom he brings along. If your invitations are for the invitee only, he is not given permission to bring anyone at all.

While working out social situations when friends divorce can be challenging, this one can be easily solved as described above. However, if all your wedding invitations are addressed to invitee and guest, then letting the ex-wife know ahead of time that he is bringing a "date" is acceptable. Try to avoid the drama involved by keeping it to a simple statement without "taking sides".

And lets all remember, the wedding isn't about the attendees. This is a glorious occasion for the couple taking vows.

Good luck,

Miss Practical Etiquette

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