Response for family functions

by ACallaghan
(Michigan)

Every year because my husband and I have the room to accommodate our large family, we host Easter, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and a large summer party. Very often we have had anywhere from 20 to 35 for holiday gatherings and from 45 to 70 at the summer party with many spending the night. We have always enjoyed hosting these family functions, however as we are now both pushing 60 it is not as easy as it once was and gets more expensive all the time. Part of the reason it is getting so hard is, the lack of consideration by many of the younger people. I always ask for a response by a certain date, (usually a couple of weeks before the event). Getting some of my nieces and nephews to respond is almost impossible. Also, the pattern lately is for them to say they are coming, offer to bring a dish, and then at the last minute not show up. My husband and I are not wealthy people, and these gatherings can get expensive. This year I have decided I am not inviting the entire group. We will welcome anyone who shows interest in coming, but there will not be an open invitation to all family. Am I wrong to do this? We are just tired of preparing food for people who end up not showing up.

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Hosting Family
by: Ms P Etiquette

Dear Generous Host~

I think your solution is excellent. I fear many families get into the habit of expecting the same person to host holidays without realizing that it is hard work and costly. I also advise that you assign certain foods, flowers, desserts, etc. to individuals at the time of the invitation. Let each know that their assignment is critical to the outcome. I'll bet you have better attendance, less drop outs and more fun!!

Good Luck!

Ms Practical Etiquette

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